welcome to 2022(2) besties, the basically angel number year which means slays for all <333333
my first slay is that at the end of 2021 i accidentally became an amateur music journalist – interviews n album reviews for now. (p.s one of each should be dropping this month or at least early feb n i will most likely link them here bc im not ashamed of self promo) im truly excited about having Paid published pieces. now i can actually claim the title Writer, but i also feel like im left behind.
usually i would jus tweet something along the lines of i hate my life why aren’t book offers coming my way, but that isnt necessarily funny. still i want to announce this feeling online. actually i Need to announce this feeling online. this is def because growing up alongside the iPhone means im prone to oversharing. but i also jus need someone to tell me im not alone.
i want favorites n comments. i want others to also think they’re too late on their dreams/craft/work/whatever so i can feel better. yet no amount of stranger’s validation will b enough. trust me – i’ve been positing selfies online since i was 13 n i still have low self-esteem (can u guys comment on my selfies more? we need this to b fixed btw).
mayb this is jus my anxiety talking, but if i was meant to b a writer wouldn’t i b one already? like yeah, sure i / write / but i mean like a writer with a blue checkmark. i have mutuals who have those – shit even my YOUNGER sibling has thousandS of more followers than me n will probably get one soon – but where’s mine? shouldn’t i give up while i still can? like its reasonable to have a mid-life crisis rn that changes my entire career path? isn’t that expected of recent graduates? i mean at least for the ones who don’t get a job offer right away aka me?
i hate scrolling on instagram and i hate scrolling on twitter more. on instagram, everyone is a model or a photographer or a band thats getting gigs. on twitter (since i tried to follow more writers in attempt to become one), everyone is tweeting published articles – multiple times a week too.
at least im making progress. at least im trying to write more. at least im reading more. at least i somehow became a music writer. i should b proud of those slays! i should celebrate! i should b excited about where ill b going from here! everyone has different timelines, im only getting started! but why did it take me so long!
im twenty fucking three! i shouldn't be worrying about this rn. but also… im twenty fucking three! im running out of time!